Each year the Christmas season represents a different feeling to me.  Joy, Excitment, Giving, Growth or plain old Fun! 

This year,  I’m feeling a little lonely and I’m not sure why.  2009 was an interesting year for me personally and professionally.  Major changes in my life have impacted who I am as a person and a Realtor in Raleigh.

I got divorced and moved on my own for the first time in my life.  I’d gone from my parents, to college with a roommate, then into marriage for 10 years…Lets just say, I’m not used to a quiet house.  This time and uncomfortable growth has provided me a new insight into what my home buyers think.  Especially, single women and divorced parents.

My marriage gave me a wonderful daughter who I’m so thankful for but it also meant I had to share and co-parent under two roofs.  My daughter goes to her fathers for most weekends.  This makes selling homes and helping home buyers really easy when I don’t have to struggle with weekend childcare but…it also means when the holidays are here, people stop looking and I’m home trying to fill my time.  Today is quiet…

I know that moving on is a wonderful step in my life.  I have solid support from my parents and brother.  It’s just tough when you live in a city without family nearby.  It really makes you cherish your friends.

Christmas 2009 is teaching me Inner Peace.  I need to be comfortable with Erica before I can reach out to others.  Living alone doesn’t equal lonely living.

My goal to your this holiday season is reach out to someone who you know has had MAJOR changes in their lives in 2009.  Take the time to find out how you can support their growth.  Maybe your gift this season will be a fresh perspective.

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2008 was a crazy, successful and soul searching year. I was reflecting on how my business and personal lives had dramatically changed. I realized that the self image I had of who I was, really translated into my business too. How I portray myself to others either builds or diminishes value in all of my relationships. If I’m not genuine about the person and professional that I am, my clients won’t desire to build a lasting relationship with me.

Here goes…my “Onion” Theory

1. How do others perceive me? Am I authentic when I meet a buyer or seller? Have I become jaded from too many years of real estate…are my clients walking paychecks instead of people?

2. How do I view myself? Am I confident in what value and service I’m bringing to the table? Why would someone want to work with me over Suzie Q down the road?

3. Do my actions reflect my beliefs and professionalism or am I “faking it to make it”? Do I treat my clients how I would want to be treated? I’ve caught myself blowing smoke just to get a deal done before…is this right?

4. Am I strong enough to really ask others to share what they think my weaknesses are? Can I handle the truth?

5. Do I take the time to look inward and analyze what I need to improve on? When I’m given feedback, do I take action to change or I just continue the same patterns?

There are so many layers to each of us, like an onion. Sometimes our business is affected by our own insecurities and self esteem issues. Real estate and mortgages is just like any other piece of life. Confidence carries over. If you are not complete and satisfied with yourself, how can you satisfy someone else’s needs. It starts at your core. You need to be connected with who you are and what you can provide to another human. It’s not a buyer, or a seller or a paycheck; it’s helping someone continue on their life’s path. I see my career in real estate as a blessing. I change lives. I help others achieve goals and dreams. I offer advice and direction to those who are lost or don’t know what is next. I’m an educator, not a sales person. It’s my duty to give people choices, provide value and the financial reward will follow…

I’ll leave you with this…Personal growth is the most important aspect of life, ESPECIALLY in these times! If we do not grow as people from the trials in front of us daily, we will be left behind. This is a tough market and economy. We have to change with it to ensure our success professionally and personally.

Take the challenge of looking inward at yourself and peel some layers back! Would you hire yourself? What types of people do you want to do business with?